Next week, I have a VERY IMPORTANT work moment. It involves putting on a suit, standing in front of a large crowd, and advocating for a position that will severely impact the rest of someone else’s life all while being interrogated by a panel of very smart people.
So, in light of having to face that special kind of professional hell in the near future, I need to focus and prepare.
One of the main pieces of my presentation involves discussing a legal case named United States v. Veal.
Whenever I say the word Veal, all I can think about is Anne Veal from Arrested Development.
Her?
And then I think about Amber Holt, who is the character that Mae Whitman plays on Parenthood.
No one knows how to make me cry like Amber.
And then I think about Amber’s ex-fiancée Ryan York.
My heart is breaking all over again.
And then I think about Luke Cafferty, who Matt Lauria played on Friday Night Lights.
Clear Eyes. Full Hearts. Can’t Lose!
And then I end up daydreaming about Tim Riggins.
All roads in my brain lead to you.
SERIOUSLY.
I just lost 45 minutes of my day to Riggins.
At this rate, my entire presentation is going to be “Dear Important People, I know I am supposed to be talking about mortgage fraud, but, instead, let me tell you about what Texas Forever means to me.”
I’m screwed.
I am going to need to fake both blindness and a pregnancy to have any hope of winning.
Stunted Adults 